Guru's Tech Bytes — Episode 117

Good morning, it's Friday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 117. I was up all night fixing my computer because Windows decided to update right in the middle of me watching a guy make a pool out of LEGOs. Just completely locked me out, which is typical Microsoft garbage, right? Anyway, I'm here, I drank a pot of coffee, and my eye is twitching, but let's get into the news. First up, UEFA and its national associations will not participate in FIFA competitions. You know what this reminds me of? That time I got banned from the bowling league for using a cantaloupe instead of a ball. It's the same shape, Lois! Anyway, it sounds like the soccer guys are having a turf war, which is crazy because they run on grass. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. Second, Stacked PRs are now live on GitHub. I don't know what a PR is, I think it's a pull request, which sounds dirty but it's not. GitHub is just stacking code up like a big nerd sandwich. Microsoft bought GitHub, so I bet they're gonna add a feature where it just force-closes your laptop halfway through making the sandwich. That's what they do, they ruin everything. Third, read this before you buy that TV streaming stick. You gotta be careful with these things, folks. I bought one and it was more frustrating than trying to explain to Chris why we can't eat the soap. Everything requires a subscription now, and the stick gets slower than me getting off the couch after a sleeve of Oreos. Just read the article so you don't pay twenty bucks to watch a guy fall off a skateboard. And finally, Gemini Robotics 2 brings whole body intelligence to robots. Whole body intelligence? I barely have arm intelligence. Now they're putting brains in the whole body, which means the robots are gonna know exactly how to open my fridge and steal my Pawtucket Patriot ale. It's only a matter of time before one of them sits in my chair and refuses to move when I want to watch TV. That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.